I love how everyone on Facebook is reacting to the whole Kanye/Taylor deal even though it really happened 3 hours earlier. I honestly don't know what to say. I don't like Taylor Swift or her music, although "You Belong to Me" is pretty much permanently planted on to my mind to be played over and over again, but at the same time, she seems so innocent and she looked so sad when Kanye stole her time. I don't hate Kanye and I think he's ok, but jeez, could he BE any more of a douchebag? This is already starting to look like one of those vlogs that people post right after the douchebagery, so I'll stop here.
Anyway, I went to my 3rd concert last night. The first was for 30 seconds to Mars, The Used, and other assorted screamo/alternative bands that incite deadly mosh pits, the second was for a J-rock androgynous band called AnCafe, and the third was for a Baroque ensemble with symphonies and concertos by Haydn and Beethoven, widely different from the first two. The musicians were terrific, the solo celloist was unbelievable, the conductor was moving, the music was rich in meaning, and the concert was altogether made of awesome, or at least, that's what I think I'm supposed to think. While the person sitting next to me is immersing himself in all these wonderful details--the way the conductor conducts, the way the music is played, how professional the musicians sound, etc--I sit in my seat, waiting, longing for the concert to just end. Why can't I enjoy the music? Why don't I feel the same as the rest of the people watching the concert? Why do I just wait for it end? I feel ashamed. I feign happiness, enjoyment, wonder at the entirety of it all.
Maybe I'm exaggerating. I enjoyed the concert, I just couldn't get myself to get into it. Maybe I'm just not a fan of Baroque. I feel like I should, though.
On another note, my birthday was today and proved to be quite uneventful. I ate lunch at Toudai, got full after one small plate, sat in a bookstore reading a book about why cute animals suck, saw people, went back home, slept, failed at buying nonexistent ipods, and virtually did nothing for the rest of the day. Did I mention the day started with my sister sitting on my glasses, causing them to contort into unusefulness, basically making me emo for the morning? I spend thirty minutes of my day wondering why my birthday has to suck, 1 hour being pissed at my sister, another hour being bored but feigning happiness, and basically going back to being depressed when I get back home, but feigning interest as I try to find an ipod for a half hour.
On a little insignificant note, I've recently officially found out that I have a moderate case of depression, also known as dysthemia. I read in an article that it was basically having more of a susceptibility to negative thoughts, and I concur, since it is pretty accurate.
Goodbye :D
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